Topsy-Turvy Ride

Life is a bitch;
A rollercoaster.
It's merely signing a lease for the unknown.

You're sheltered for at least some of the time,
In one form or another.
Raised in a small or big family.
With a single parent, both, adopted, or none.
Below the poverty line, middle class, or wealthy.

Sometimes you assimilate to the surroundings like a chameleon.
Sometimes you stick out like an oddly-shaped formation.
Sometimes you know who you are and are rewarded or denied.
Sometimes you're confused, and you don't know what direction to take.

Then comes the point to continue to college, or take on different paths.
A time where you figure out if you have enough to go, or not;
Sometimes even if you are or aren't cut out for it because people cut you down to scraps.
Sometimes you find yourself or become new and stronger.

There comes a time to survive.
Experience dark days and even brighter nights.
Leases, rent, bills, student loans, jobs, food, companionship, death of loved ones, abandonment, douchebags, roommates, depression, kids, business ownership, and much, much more ups-and-downs.
All swirl together like a never-ending storm competing for attention.

There is a time where you will cycle between good and evil.
Either feeling you're on-top-of-the-world,
Or feeling there is no light at the end of the tunnel.
You will cycle, and the cliche is true: It Does Get Better.

There will be so many moments.
Big, or small like grains of sand.
Life in respect is beautiful,
Though still a bitter bitch.

There will also be a time when the lease runs out.
Whether you're young, or middle-aged, or elderly.
Whether it's quick or slow.
Death is not a looming, dreadful thing.
It is just a price.
Something worked hard for.
And a stamp for completing a life no matter how it's lived.

Lion's Golden Heart

Courage ignites inside me,
When my hand joins yours.

It thaws the layers of ice,
Around a protected heart.

My heart shines of gold,
It glints showing the world a me that's been hiding.

I can let loose the beast my renewed courage revealed.
I can let loss feelings I refused to show.
I can be me because I don't have to fear.

Everything goes two ways.
You have shown me the best and worst.
Your courage and life ignite like you have done for me.

Reminder

I never seem to win.
I can't be logical,
Nor practical in reasoning.
Not when it comes to love.

So much weighs on my heart,
And in my brain that I feel smothered.
So much pain that I feel like I can't breathe.
So much love and no one to put it toward.

The very core of who I am is based on love.
Romantic and brotherly, the same.
All my thoughts irrational, fabrications.
A battle I feel I can't win.

I fall so quickly,
That it feels like it takes a lifetime to stand up again.
Each time worse than the last.
Each time fearing that there is no love left in the world.

I feel like an island,
Alone in the ocean.
Feelings string together into a depression.
A depression that this is the way it should be.

Though in rational thoughts, this is not true.
That I am loved.
That I am not that island and someone cares.
That I can love as deeply as I want.

I just have to wait before I lay it all on the line.
Learn from my hurting heart that I can't have the one I love.
Learn that it is okay to feel alone.
That love doesn't have to lead into that hole of depression.